Fate's End

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It was five past seven when all Hell decided to break loose. This was not pure chance. Hell does not suddenly break into the material plane without careful consideration and years of planning which was something Lucifer could definitely attest to. After all he had planned this break out for what seemed like an eternity if only because that was exactly how long it had been.

But the day had finally arrived and after many blood sacrifices and unpaid parking fines Lucifer had managed to crack open a gateway that lead to the material plane.

He charged through the gateway, followed closely by his demonic forces. Each demon was covered head to toe in tribal tattoos that spoke of their accomplishments; corrupted priests, civil wars. One tattoo depicted the shopping channels found on day time television so you know its owner must have been truly devious.

Lucifer himself had no markings to speak of. He had no horns or tusks. His appearance was purely angelic in nature. You would be forgiven to assume he was not otherwise if not for his scorched wings. They were once a great testament to his beauty however now they were nothing more than a hollow frame. An apt analogy for his existence if he ever stopped to think about it but he never did. He spent all of his time thinking about baked goods.

For Lucifer was not evil by nature, he was actually quite nice if you got to know him. He would have loved nothing more than to leave his Hellish job behind and start a small bakery somewhere by the seaside. But it was all this business with the blasted prophecies that prevented that. They foretold of his invasion upon the Earth. His future had already been written for him.

Lucifer and his army spewed forth from the gateway somewhere off the coast of Finland just as the prophecy foretold. He flapped his wings once and they resounded an almighty crack. And as per the prophecy Lucifer reappeared in a small office somewhere on the west coast of Australia.

It was a grand office. The shelves sagged under the weight of numerous first editions detailing everything from Special Relativity to Quantum Field Theory. The large oak desk that sat at the far end of the room groaned under the weight of the multitudes of papers stacked high. Behind the desk lay a similarly regal chair but it was not occupied. Instead a man stood to its side and casually threw a tennis ball against the closest wall, catching it as it rebounded. He repeated this action a few times before he turned around and noticed Lucifer standing in the middle of the room.

“Hello Professor,” spake Lucifer half-heartedly. According to the prophecies this was the start of his eventual world wide conquest. He wasn't looking forward to it. Blood made him queasy.
“Oh hello,” replied the Professor. “You seem to have caught me at a bad time. Did you make an appointment with Darryl?”
“Our meeting has been foretold since the dawn of time. Darryl should know of my coming.”
“Yes, but did you specifically tell Darryl that you wanted to see me?”
The Prince of Hell admitted this was not the case. The annoyed Professor bounced the tennis ball once or twice off the wall.
“I can spare you five minutes,” said the Professor. “How can I help?”
As per the prophecy Lucifer replied, “My name is Lucifer, the Light Bringer, the Morning Star. I have waited many aeons to speak with you for our meeting has been prophesied since time immemorial. Our meeting is the beginning of my conquest. The beginning of the downfall. The beginning of the end.”

The Professor remained unfazed. He had dealt with enough crazies in the past that had claimed the secret to perpetual motion or decried space travel as nothing more than lies that it took something truly special to shake him. He made a mental note to speak with Darryl afterwards on the precise nature of who he was allowed to let into the office.

“You mentioned prophecies?” the Professor enquired.
“There have been many,” answered Lucifer. He recited one of the more popular and coherent passages.
“Well that is all well and good,” replied the Professor when Lucifer had finished. “But I was more referring to the nature of the prophecies themselves. By accepting these prophecies as truth we are assuming a deterministic view of the universe. One where everything has been carefully laid out since the beginning of time. And where nothing can deviate from its set path.
“However we know that such a universe is impossible. We live in a chaotic world. One where particles are governed by wave equations. The very nature of subatomic particles are probabilistic so to predict the future from so far out to such a precise degree, even on a macro scale, is unfathomable. In simple terms because our universe is not deterministic, these prophecies are utter tosh.”

This gave Lucifer some pause.
“But the prophecy must be correct. It has been foretold for generations.”
“And my horoscope said it would be a quiet day for me today, but here we are.”
“So you're saying, from a pure scientific viewpoint mind you, that these prophecies are bollocks and in fact I can do what I want with my life.”
“Well yes. God plays dice with all of us.”

There was a crack. The Professor was alone once more. By mid afternoon there were no signs that the demonic horde had ever invaded and the world continued on as it had before; oblivious on account of everyone making the very wise choice to simply forget the past day had ever occurred. The only souvenir of the whole debacle was the addition of a small shop that had sprung up overnight located by the seaside.

Inside Lucifer took a freshly baked loaf out from the oven. And it was good.

About the Author: 
The wonderful thing about learning is that you come to realise there exists a vast wealth of information that you simply do not and cannot obtain. Jeremy has come to the realisation that writing 'About the Author' sections falls under this category.